@TurnpikeTony: I better fix the hinge on this cabinet door before Ryan Gosling comes over, takes his shirt off and builds my lady a house.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Freudstombstone: It hurts my feelings when people call me a failure. I'd rather people think of me as successfully challenged.
@ColoradoCrow: Im going to change my name on Facebook to "Benefits", so that when you add me it will say, "You are now friends with benefits"
@TheHyyyype: ME: i honestly only had one drink WIFE: i don't believe a word you just said ME: no, i swear *pulls out dictionary* they're all real