@briangaar: I blow-dried my hair, now it looks like the mane of a majestic lion who is really good at video games
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@onion_an: [coming home from cinema] Don't let that ninja film go to your head again. *roundhouse kicks the light switch on* "I won't"
@thisislizz: The D word that everyone's been feeling at work is depression. I guessed the wrong word, apparently. Aaaaand there's HR calling me. Brb.
@tigersgoroooar: Not to brag, but I just bought Eggland's best eggs from the grocery store. Their BEST eggs. I got them.
@marebytes: Hey people who design vacuums- Why the headlight? Are people vacuuming in the dark? or riding them on the freeway & I just havent seen?