@lazerdoov: I bought "extra whitening" toothpaste and now my teeth are spending a year in Korea teaching English
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@Blondiethegood: There is no panic like the panic you feel when you think you may have clogged the toilet at someone else's house.
@dumbbeezie: Please pray for girls everywhere who are getting a "What's up" text right now Be strong. Don't answer. Eat ice cream.
@weinerdog4life: How to make friends: Put your clothes on backwards so people don't notice you walking up to them.