@celticrose2312: I bought shampoo for "badly behaved" hair. So relieved my hair will finally stop robbing banks and terrorising old ladies.
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@3sunzzz: You smell wonderful. Can I ask what you're wearing? Sure, it's the perfume sample on page 49 in April's Cosmo.
@djdarrellripley: Her: Your house has a lot of cool stuff in it... Who plays the piano? Me: Pretty much anybody who is trying to get on somebody's nerves.
@NurseMurderer: If a party with all dudes is called a "sausage fest", I request that we start calling all girl parties "taco time".
@LFdiepretty: Calm down, I'm only asking for your last name because I want to check how well it pairs with the baby names I have picked out for our kids.