@celticrose2312: I bought shampoo for "badly behaved" hair. So relieved my hair will finally stop robbing banks and terrorising old ladies.
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@MarieColette: If anyone's looking to join a pyramid scheme, hit me up and I'll connect you with all the girls I went to high school with via facebook.
@brynnester: I'll never forget my Uncles last words on his death bed "I am your Father" Still doing the Star Wars impressions right to the end
@UnFitz: Dyslexic Superbowl watchers were probably disappointed when they saw football instead of a superb owl.
@RobElliottComic: Say "Literally" and "Legit" a few more times in that sentence so I know it's literally legit