@djr_102: I broke up with a girl once by leaving a note on the front door that simply said: "Love doesn't live here anymore, and now, neither do you."
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@ZombieProblms: I hate being the walking dead. I wish I could be the driving dead. Even the bus riding dead would do.
@iJesseWilliams: 1) In the interest of time, would ye noble patriots please provide a list of infractions punishable by spontaneous public execution? Thanks!
@TheMichaelRock: Wife: were you even listening to me? Me: no Wife: then what did I just s...wait, what? Me: I said no Wife: I'm not sure what to do now