@VerbsRProudest: I called someone persnickety today. He looked so taken aback. Some people can't handle that kind of hip vibe & powerful sensuality I guess.
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@SortaBad: A $7 voucher at the airport is like having 100 skeeball tickets at Chuck E Cheese: it sounds good on paper but won't get you anything decent
@Ristolable: I like my women like I like my coffee. I look at coffee but I am afraid to talk to it
@flashember: *wakes up in the belly of a whale* me: this can't be happening again morgan freeman: but it was, he was in the belly of a whale again
@stephenjmolloy: Wife: "I'm sick and tired of your walkie-talkie obsession. This marriage is over." Me: "You broke up there. This marriage is what? Over."