@dril: i can confirm that Somali pirates have intercepted my shipment of 20,000 glossy 8x10 headshots and are using them for vile purposes
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@Sarcasticsapien: Coworker: If you had to do it all over again, would you? Me: Yeah. Cw: You would? Why? Me: Because I know what the words "had to" means.
@ShutUpThatsWho: [opening can of Russian Pringles] once u pop u [inside can is a slightly smaller can] huh [inside that can is an even smaller can] wtf [in..
@goodersuk74: Unless you fell off the treadmill and smashed your face open I really dont need to hear about your gym workout
@HallpassCanada: Everyone always wants to date the hot crazy chick.....Till you're standing outside watching your house burn.