@svnsxtional: I can give out my number and I bet 8152898509 dollars my phone will still be dry.
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@jonnysun: how to talk to a woman wearing headphones: 1. be the artist she has currently chosen to listen to through her headphones
@girlontapas: Get a dog from the shelter for your kids and you're a hero but get a hobo from the shelter to babysit your kids and everyone gets all upset
@TheSnideOne: What I say: "Does anyone need anything from the store?" What I mean: "I'm off to smoke a bowl in my car so I can deal with all of you."