@tsm560: I can make just about anything happen simply by hoping it won't.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Iwriteforcats: [At Fancy Restaurant] Her: I'll have the oxtail topped with quail egg. Him: Gimme a steak. Her: *glares Him: Uhh, topped with a Cadbury?
@DrunksWithGuns: If I could make water into wine, I'd probably stumble out of a cave 3 days later too.
@imadepoopstoday: I've learned that you can buy a kitten with no problem, but you have to come back at a different time to buy the juicer.
@joshgondelman: Whenever I watch a home invasion thriller, I'm mostly terrified by how I'll never be able to afford to own a home.