@Sirrruh: I can't be the only woman who gets creeped out when she realizes her ovaries sniff out and sync up with other ovaries without her permission
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@1evilidiot: If Adrian Peterson is getting indicted for spanking his kid with a stick my mom should get the electric chair.
@JediGigi: My Daddy taught me to lick it before I stick it- I say to the judges as I hang a spit covered spoon from my nose.
@scottthetwat: Homes are 750 square feet larger today than they were 30 years ago. Unfortunately, so are most Americans.