@Elizasoul80: I can't believe I live in a world where our only defense against a blizzard is buying extra milk.
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@Fazio_N: You've been robbed by *360 spin* A smooooth crimi- *trips over own feet, drops tv, & butt dials police*
@TheAlexP: She said "you look like trouble"...so I nudged her down the stairs, because I don't like people falling short of their expectations.
@tastefactory: *cats pull on masks* This is the ultimate heist. Let's get those jewels. *cats immediately set off alarm trying to attack the laser beams*
@ArfMeasures: [Starbucks] ME: [bursts in] THERE'S A GUNMAN AT LARGE BARISTA: [shrugs] ME: [sigh] THERE'S A GUNMAN AT VENTI B: *grande screaming noises*