@meganamram: I can't believe it's 2012 and street signals are still only telling white people to cross
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@Doyle_McLain: BREAKING NEWS ON FACEBOOK! Pam wants everyone to know what a great husband Don has been these last 8 years & for making her so very happy!
@mattZillaaaa: Some girl is stalking me & has been telling ppl I'm her boyfriend. I'm flattered but I prefer to be the psychotic one in the relationship
@inmybox07: Whoever designated mini cupcakes as "two-bite" has greatly underestimated my #cupcake eating abilities.