@LuvPug: I can't get out of bed, my Fitbit is charging and my steps won't count
@ShotOfBull: I found a message in a bottle. It said:
"The girl at the end of the bar is a lot hotter than she was 2 hours ago."
@Only_Fast_Eddie: Some women have mood swings... others have mood theme parks.
@darth: i fixed ur flag pin for u sean
@RyanKeith15: Drugs don't kill people. People that don't have drugs kill people.
@Contwixt: I just found a Macklemore CD in a Thrift Shop and the Universe imploded.