@st00pidfast: I can't make you love me but I can tie you up and feed you until you're too fat to be loved by anyone else.
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@GrandadJFreeman: Another Twilight movie?God I hope Abraham Lincoln shows up and slays every last one of them.
@SoulYodeler: When coining nicknames, be sure it reflects how that person has impacted your life. For example, my two sons Buzzkill and Third Mortgage.
@catstronomical: Me:Come in. It's not like I'm a serial killer. Him:*laughs nervously* Me: *laughing* u have to murder more than 2 ppl for it to be serial
@Owl_Meat: *puts bread in toaster* hmm something strange about the toaster today Duck(from in toaster): no there isnt