@BreadFoster: I can't wait until Taylor Swift breaks up with a black guy so she can put out a rap album.
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@AristotlesNZ: Car broke down. Seen enough Man vs Wild to survive. 20mins later when the tow truck showed up I was drinking urine out of a poodle's skull.
@PellMull: I go under the police tape, approach the chalk outlined body, and flash my subway sandwich card. "Ok what do we got here?"
@TheTweetOfGod: You are free to criticize athletes. They are free to criticize you too of course, but they don't, because your job is dull and no one cares.