@mdob11: I carry tumbleweed so I can let it roll across the floor during awkward silences.
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@Dawn_M_: Awww it's cute how your baby pulls my hair. Like she doesn't realise I will pull hers right back.
@SardonicTart: "OMG why am I so sore?" *Flashback to me doing five push-ups yesterday* "Oh right."
@JanineEB4: My kids in public are direct payback for every time I shriek'd PLEASE DON'T HIT ME AGAIN at my mom in the middle of a crowded mall as a kid.
@thegrugq: I've now had my account locked and been forced to change my password so many times it is up to: password1234567