@FilthyRichmond: I caught myself whistling the Unsolved Mysteries theme while hiding a body.
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@2tickytacky: I had to memorize a random 18 digit password before she'd let me in. Guess who stole your Soap Opera Digest out of the mailbox, Mom?
@TwistedEmbrace: I get 9" in bed every night. That's how much mattress is left for me once the dogs get comfortable.
@Marlebean: A "clear memory" button, but for my brain. And while we're at it, a "delete cookies" button, but for my thighs.
@briangaar: Sometimes I'm playing a dangerous game like Halo & people ask if I get scared but honestly no, your training just takes over