@theshamingofjay: I change Siri to a man's voice and now it doesn't answer any more questions and turns off for hours
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@T_Bonezzz: "One day, I will create a global business-oriented social networking service" - Abraham LinkedIn
@suntzufuntzu: YELLOW HIPPO: (whispering to red hippo) I'm not your enemy. Marble scarcity is a myth spread by humans to turn us against each other.
@AndyAsAdjective: Wear green for St Patty's Day! You don't wanna get punched! -You mean pinched [flashback to the 6 people I punched earlier] It's pinched?
@HammerFist3: I want to buy a Prius because I plan on driving off of a cliff & I don't want to make too big of an explosion & kill squirrels or turtles