@McGrumpenstein: Wife: We should go camping
Me: Yay
*waits til wife is gone to tell kids the Blair Witch Project plot. Camping trip turns into visit to NYC*
@JT_IV_: Men simply like to adjust their junk,
it's not pocket science.
@GoldenSpirals: Naked and Afraid,
but it's just me staring down a spider in the shower.
@haleysfalling: accidentally added a "z" to the end of the word "think" in a text and suddenly my jeans are sagging below my ass and i have 3 chains on
@autocorrects: You're 15 and miss the 90's? Yeah, I'm sure those were the best 2 years of your life. Shitting in your pants and eating dirt.
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