@djdarrellripley: After we got the divorce she let me have everything. Except the jewelry, and of course something to keep it in. I call it "the house"..

@CherBear162: I really want a Popsicle but I'm so not in the mood for Freezer Jenga.

@Black__Elvis: My girlfriend's father got mad that I proposed to her without asking him first but there's just no way I would ever marry that guy.

@Storminika: It's not cool to skip on dating someone who talks funny -- just because your english is gooder than theirs be.

@Vodkantots: "How much for the supermodel?" *winks seductively "Ma'am, that's a mirror and you appear to be having a stroke."