@Brianhopecomedy: I checked my phone while I was mowing the lawn and now we don't have a garden.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@rockymomax: DRUG DEALER: whatya want? ME: *takes his hand in mine* what do YOU want? DRUG DEALER: *tearing up* no one ever asks me that
@longwall26: Me: How did Bruce and Alfred build the Batcave all by themselves? The Lord: I meant any questions about the mysteries of existence