@nocturnallyme: I could be wrong, but an escape goat strikes me as an awfully inefficient getaway plan.
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@cameronrbrown: Just one more week until I can finally eat candy out of my socks again.... without looking weird.
@Hormonella: So Mother Theresa puts a dish towel on her head and she's a "saint" but when I put a dish towel on MY head I'm "drunk in the kitchen again?"
@SteussieErica: Husband: We should go to Costco. Me [still in pajamas]: So I should change? H: I said Costco, not Walmart. Me:*puts on nicer pajamas*
@brandonIee: I have decided to leave my past behind me, so if I owe you money… I'm sorry, but I've moved on, and maybe it's time that you do too.