@Donnie_Fairburn: I could get hit and killed by a truck right in front of him and my dentist would still find a way to blame it on the fact that I don't floss
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@jazmasta: [making small talk at a business function] "You're 35 aren't you?" "No, I'm 38" "Oh right" [long silence] "Did you used to be 35?"
@TheTweetOfGod: He who knows, does not speak. He who speaks, does not know. Shut up, is basically what I'm saying.
@shariv67: Most women desire someone who makes them laugh and also feel safe, so basically a clown ninja.
@jus4golf: Attractive women post selfies and refer to themselves as ugly. As a group, if we begin agreeing with them we could stop that shit quick.