@timdonakowski: I could make a sandwich before a British person finishes saying "et cetera."
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@Storminika: My kid needs me to help him with a report on any famous black scientist. Can we do Dr. Dre?
@MikeCanRant: You have to put a potato in the microwave to push the potato button. Other things dont turn into potatoes. *brought to you by Bounty*
@Jfficial: People laugh cause I've got 3 cats, but come the next Ice Age, when I speed past you on my cat sled, who'll be laughing then?
@BradBroaddus: Some guy just passed toilet paper under the stall without me even asking. I'm not sure if he is a pervert or a wizard.