@hiitsmolly: "I could probz bench press, like, five of you"-me talking to a cool squirrel I just met
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@TheRobCee: Got kicked off the cruise ship after three day of constantly saying "poop deck" & snickering.
@1Happytwit: Cats are weird. They look at you like they want to set you on fire then look all surprised when you toss them into the ceiling fan.
@TheCatWhisprer: Hello Darkness, my old frie- *the lights suddenly turn on* oh it's like that now?