@hiitsmolly: "I could probz bench press, like, five of you"-me talking to a cool squirrel I just met
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@KyleMcDowell86: [Friend] Kyle, u have to stop referring to your Ballet Club as a "gang" [Me & my gang all do 2 pirouettes and stop in unison] "Not a chance"
@_making_friends: I'm currently between relationships. The couple on my right are kissing and I think the couple on my left are about to start doing it.
@wittwitbarista: By allowing my children to play their music & video games loudly, I'm able to get candy out of its wrapper into my mouth unseen.