@lilgapeach32: I could understand Eve's choice to doom all of humanity if she'd been offered nachos. But an apple? My ovaries are not amused.
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@TweetsByTheTony: In pretty sure my wife's most prized possession is her plastic bag full of other plastic bags.
@MooseAllain: If you are single, book a table for two this Valentine’s. Keep checking your watch. Order your meal for one, tearfully. Result: Free drinks!
@jackiembouvier: Substitute teaching 1st graders was not at all the Dead Poets Society experience I was hoping it would be.