@girlontapas: I could've chosen a life of crime but it seems like it would interfere with my 9pm bedtime.
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@HomeProbably: I wouldn't complain if I died, mostly because I'd be dead.
@djdarrellripley: I took my dog to see "Fifty Shades Of Grey" and he loved it. Which surprised me because he hated the book...
@OfficialMizGin: Years ago I went to a job placement agency. I left disappointed. Apparently nobody offers temp work as an astronaut.
@Home_Halfway: Accidentally used AXE shampoo to wash my cat the other day and now he's boxing strays and impregnated 17 dogs
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