@abrianmc: I covered my gf with dough and raisins and put her in the oven to annoy her. Hell hath no fury like a woman sconed
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@1Happytwit: 6yo's can't go to jail so I have no idea why this one's refusing to drive me home from the pub.
@TheMichaelRock: I bet the murder rate is so low in Canada because you have to go 300 miles to find someone to kill.
@Sassafrantz: I don't want to seem desperate after a date so I usually text him 10 years later when he has a wife and kids.