@dukelongboard: I crack my knuckles, turn to the cops and say "I got this" as I stroll toward the bank robbers and get shot in the face
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@LizHackett: God returns to his desk with a midnight snack. He squints at a video feed of Earth. The plate of nachos falls to the floor in slow motion.
@DGComedy: Alex Jones said that lesbians are torturing women and eating their brains. Ummmmm...Alex? That’s not What We Eat.
@Matt_The_1st: I may not be able to out run the zombies when they come, but this cheeseburger is going to make me taste great