@FuckabillyRex: I cross-bred an octopus and a panda. Let me know if you're interested in a pretty amazing hug.
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@jdforshort: If you need me, I'll be in the bathroom I guess it's finally time to shave my legs for spring *Walks away with hedge trimmers
@Howiesbookclub: "Daddy, are we poor?" Compared to the vast majority of humans on earth? No. "Compared to my friends?" Oh yes, sweety. As the very dirt.
@shkeeber: I've been standing in IKEA with a lamp shade on my head for 3 days, hiding from the cops.