@CarpentersCrack: I date waitresses so I can ask them if everything is ok when their mouth is full.
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@lipstck_junkie: My 6 y/o told me the medicine cabinet was our most important cabinet. Outwardly I agreed but inwardly: "no son, the liquor cabinet is".
@AllieA: On my first day of college my dad's only advice was "don't date any of your teachers!" Yeah right dad, everyone knows teachers are poor.