@JimGaffigan: I didn't get a chance to do yoga this morning or any other morning of my life.
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@MyPornKhan: When folks unfollow me shortly after they've followed me I just figure they sobered up.
@LurkAtHomeMom: IF YOU KIDS DON'T COME BACK TO THIS TABLE AND FINISH YOUR LUNCH RIGHT NOW, I SWEAR I WILL SIGH HEAVILY, EAT IT MYSELF AND GAIN 3 POUNDS.
@julezmac: Football is so cute it's like some guys are like we're gonna get you and one guys like no no no no