@WilliamAder: I didn't sign up for the 401k at work, because there's no way I can run that far.
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@crunchenhancer: I judge the strength of the economy based on what type of candy people hand out on Halloween.
@curlymalloy: I helped a little old lady at the market today.. She was too short to grab a box of cereal from the top shelf, so I stood on her shoulders!
@Jesssicle: People are writing condolences on my Grandma's Facebook that sound more like Yelp reviews of her. Great woman, very loving, 5/5 stars