@Chumpstring: I didn't spend 8 years designing this hotel so I could listen to a bunch of touristy complaints about the small cameras inside the toilets.
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@MasterSociopath: I mistook the Facebook status box for Google search, and now I don't have to go to family functions any more.
@SwedishCanary: I've spotted six Pokémon today but I don't have the Pokémon GO app so it may just be that I need my new meds adjusted.
@JerseyRambo: My psychiatrist is mad at me, told him I could hear people but couldn't see them...he said when does this happen...I said over the phone
@IncrediblyRich: Saw Helena Bonham Carter walking down Wardour Street earlier looking every inch the mystical vagabond. Was tempted to rub her head for luck.