@chadzappa: I didn't spend years perfecting this blank, vacant expression so you could mistake me for someone who cares, lady...
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@britt_anylynn: The sign at the McDonald's I just passed says "We hiring" in case you're wondering what kind of qualifications you need to have to be hired.
@sip_at_home_mom: 2016 took so many beautiful, talented men I've loved my entire life. Seems unfair that I still have to dodge my ex at the grocery store.
@eTHEgoddess: The glittery vampire from Twilight is putting out an album. In other news, real musicians continue to play for coins in the subway.
@rzarosco: Nice try weed people... Are we just supposed to legalize anything that comes from the ground? What's next potatoes?