@Mr_Kapowski: I didn't want the cop to see that my car's registration tags weren't current but apparently swerving erratically got his attention too
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KentWGraham: After lengthy reflection, I’ve concluded that having kids wasn’t worth the seven times my son took out the garbage for me.
@thatUPSdude: I'm not saying I'm bilingual but Brad Pitt is hot. In other news, I might not know what bilingual means.
@novicefather: [interview] "Describe yourself in 5 words." me: Salacious. Professionally sensual. HR compliant.