@Ndeshi_M: I didn't want to grow up; I just wanted to be able to reach for the cookies.
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@Lmao: What I said: I forgot my book. What the teacher heard: I hate school, I hate you & I don't want to make something out of my life.
@QwertyJones3: If you're in your car, go ahead and pick your nose, because the car makes you invisible.
@wolfpupy: first you light 100 candles, then you fall asleep. this 'burn your house down' spell works every time
@FullGrownChris: "Where are you all going?" A lifeboat. The Titanic is sinking. "You guys are booked til 2. Trust me, this'll be great exposure for your band