@Ndeshi_M: I didn't want to grow up; I just wanted to be able to reach for the cookies.
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@WeekendTwitr: Get noticed by more companies on LinkedIn by adding af to the end of all of your job titles.
@Swishergirl24: No thanks Kentucky Derby. If I wanted to see a defenseless animal get beat into submission I'd just call my boss.
@rockymomax: CLERK: $3.74 ME: *reaches in pocket & pulls out whole ham* sorry I have cash *reaches back in & pulls out 2nd ham* well this is embarrassing