@BradBroaddus: I don't always eat breakfast in my underwear but when I do, I get escorted out of Waffle House.
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@EJGomez: dating tip: do NOT kiss their dad on the first date to establish dominance. wait until at least the second date. he will respect you more
@Ilovelamp1979: One of the worst things about tweeting while driving is all of the people that seem to appear out of nowhere on the sidewalk.