@1BigMick: I don't appreciate my son's teacher circling all the wine stains on his homework.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@JermHimselfish: My girlfriend buys candles the same way I buy weed. She looks at the color, opens it and smells it, buys it, then lights it on fire to relax
@TheAlexNevil: If you hear one of the high piano keys repeating slowly, you’re either watching a trailer for a horror movie, or you are a parent.