@Vice_Queen: I don't believe in gender equality because there are just some things I'm not meant to do. Like be the sane one in a relationship.
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@Xoolun: My wife tells me she wants me to surprise her with a gift that will take her breath away. I'm thinking about getting her a treadmill.
@kirbys4losers: Maybe I can bury my burned out vibrators in the Pet Sematary and they'll come back to life with a vengeance.