@BrattyBarbie: I don't care how old you are, the only safe way to guarantee the monster under the bed doesn't grab you is to use the run and jump method.
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@gagging: Michael Jackson breaks into WALMART. He only steals lotion. Turning to the security camera he whispers "smooth criminal" and moonwalks away
@peaceintruth1: I'm at my quickest when I try to follow someone out of the bathroom so I don't have to touch the handle.
@kramediggles: If someone catches me staring I quickly look to my left & right so they think "oh that girl's not looking at ME she's looking at EVERYTHING"
@Lerky: Me: you're like heroin. Her: Why? Because you're addicted to me? Me: No, because you're ruining my life.