@envydatropic: I don't care what bathroom you identify with. If you look under the stall you're going to need a dentist.
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@LoveNLunchmeat: I miss being a kid and playing cowboys and Indians. Now whenever I chase people around with a tomahawk I get arrested.
@loribuckmajor: Husband said our electricity bills are too high need to cut back so I asked him to move.
@TheDreamGhoul: if u think ur house is haunted get a cat. whooshing sound? it's the cat. hear footsteps? def the cat. unseen being devouring your soul? cat.
@JhonRules: When girls ask if I'm good in bed, I tell them "Of course, how hard is it to close your eyes and literally do nothing for 8 hours".