@Tmoney68: I don't care which way you swing, guy wearing a Tapout t-shirt & Capri pants, but you've GOT to make a choice.
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@TheTweetOfGod: Instagram is experiencing difficulties. Until further notice, please cease visually chronicling the tedious mundanities of your life.
@delusions_of: This could be the expired methamphetamines talking but yeah, I'd love to babysit your kids.
@MUMSIEesq: My mom said I gained weight so I told her I was pregnant. Now I've got like 8 months to prepare to raise a fake baby.