@ninatreemonkey: I don't even like sleep, it's just the only way I can eat spiders
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@merewillis: My husband showed me beautiful flowers on his phone & said, "Look, I got you some flowers." So I put them in a vase of water. #LastLaugh
@ClichedOut: They say 1 out of every 5 humans is Chinese. Out of me and my 4 siblings, I'm pretty sure it's either Carl or Liu Yang.
@BGH70: I often wish that gravity was a more selective force regarding who it kept on this planet.
@Darlainky: Instead of asking "Are you still watching?" Netflix just said "Hey, pace yourself, we're almost out of shows."