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@MarcusTheToken: I don't hate anyone. I just don't like people.
@roostermustache: Kid: help my cat's stuck in a tree can you save him
Me: of course little girl *throws bible at cat* do you accept jesus as your lord
@lecalabara: Ok gas pump, enough! Credit or debit? Zip code? Reward Card? Car Wash? Receipt? What octane? It takes less buttons to launch a nuke!
@TrueTorontoGirl: Some of you are like family to me. I don’t want you calling me either.
@bea_ker: "It's definitely better without a condom" I say, removing it from my soup
@Shock_Monster: Anyone that says there are no stupid questions has never had to explain to a 5 year old why there are no pink bananas 267 times today.