@kwirkyKerri: I don't have a pet so I decided to adopt the spider living in the corner of my kitchen. Her name is Monique. I hope she isn't knocked up.
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@WritePlay: AMAZON: Did you buy a watch?! ME: Yeah, it's- AMAZON: You might want THIS watch! ME: No I already- AMAZON: ONLY WATCHES FOR YOU, FOREVERMORE
@simoncholland: You realize kids in other countries make Air Jordan's and iPhones right? -Me responding poorly to my kid's homemade Father's Day gifts.