@kwirkyKerri: I don't have a pet so I decided to adopt the spider living in the corner of my kitchen. Her name is Monique. I hope she isn't knocked up.
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@pleatedjeans: worst place to be stung by bees is the club bc it just looks like you're doing cool dance moves & sure u win the dance off but at what cost
@causticbob: I've written a book called, 'How Not To Get Conned Out Of Your Money'. It's available in all good bookshops priced £149.99.
@jakob_huber: On a bad dinner date? Bump the table with your knee to make the water in your glass ripple. Claim a T-Rex is coming. Sprint out the door.