@grmonta: I don't know what's more embarrassing, accidentally sending nudes to your boss or getting a pay decrease as a result of your nudes.
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@UncleDuke1969: Son: Dad, is cousin Billy a mosquito? Me: In Alabama? S: Yeah. M: Of course not. Why do you ask? S: Mom said he was the product of insects.
@trevso_electric: I don't have ADD. It's just that everything is more interesting than what I have to get done.
@kyle_thatisall: Netflix would be by far the best dating site. "Here are 9 other singles in your area who have also watched Pokemon for 12 straight hrs"