@XGroverX: I don't know why smokey the bear carries a shovel, but it scares the shit out of me.
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@myles_morrison: I start every argument off with "first of all..." like I'm really going to school them, but my second point is always just name calling.
@mc_funbags: People say that Twitter is pointless but it's teaching my children to be self sufficient.
@Elizasoul80: Turn your trip to the grocery store into a ninja challenge by shopping strictly out of other people's carts when they're not looking.