@rocknthepurple: I don't know why so many people blame their air conditioning for their inability to spell.
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@LostFelicia: I have two sisters. One sent me a package with tinsel filler and a glitter card. Now I have one sister.
@JosesLovesYou: If you took your large intestine and stretched it out in a straight line it would be very hard to get it back in you after that. So tangly.
@KentWGraham: I guess writing “To Whom It May Concern” on the note of apology isn’t the wisest idea when your wife accuses you of being cold and impersonal.
@LizHackett: It’s not the holidays until I see two minivans with red noses lock antlers over a parking space at Target.