@markleggett: I don't like it when a pretty girl with glasses takes them off, and her eyes were actually painted onto the inside of the lenses.
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@Reverend_Scott: [1692 Salem] "BURN THE WITCH" U HAVE A CROOKED NOSE, WITCH "No, Frank, at the stake" [quickly lighting torch] Right, I knew that.
@Cheeseboy22: We can't afford to take our kids to a corn maze this year so we're just going to take them to an IKEA instead.
@sarcasticmommy4: My kids are celebrating National Siblings Day just like I knew they would: screaming & fighting.