@BrettDruck: I don't like when they use "late" to describe a deceased person. It's like give a guy a break on his attendance, he's dead.
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@FredPollack: Found a bag of weed in my son's bedroom, absolutely horrified! The thing was practically all stems and seeds.
@LurkAtHomeMom: My husband keeps nagging me to get my oil changed, which is ridiculous because I swear I just did that three thousand months ago.
@Jen_says_nah: Texts friend: sorry, I'm running late. Friend: no problem, let me know when you're on your way. [ 6 weeks later] Ok I've left.